Forgetting The Past
Hello! My name is Jennifer and I’ve been involved with joyful noise Xpress for about ten years now. Through this new family I have joined, I am learning to rely on prayer as my compass, to submit to God’s guidance, and to let God become the Lord of my life.
I want to share with you the turning point in my life and hope that it will serve as an encouragement to you on your own journey as well.
The story begins when I was three years old. My parents were getting a divorce because my father had mistakenly believed a friend of his who told him my mother was cheating on him. In the heat of the moment, my father purchased a small vile of acid and poured it onto my mother’s right cheek, causing irreversible damage. The damage to my parents’ relationship became irreversible as well.
My mother’s family pressed charges and my father was subsequently sent to jail. And I was put in an orphanage. My grandmother adopted me shortly after, out of the kindness of her heart.
Through the years, whenever I prayed or did devotions, I would always see the same vision from God: I am together with my mom and dad — we are together, holding hands.
I would often ask the Lord, “Will this be actualized some day? Can the wounds from their past be healed?” I prayed about this often and waited patiently for the Lord’s guidance and courage.
Two years ago, my husband and I traveled to Hong Kong to visit family. I found out that my dad was going to have heart surgery in Taiwan at the same time. God gave me the courage to invite my mom and my dad to come see me at the hotel in Taiwan in which we were staying. To my surprise, they both obliged and came together! This would be the first time they had seen each other since their divorce 40 years ago. I almost couldn’t believe what I witnessed! But such is the great power of our God: he does what seems impossible from our human standpoint!
This past year, my dad came to the US to visit me. I was reminded, in my prayers, to spend some time alone with my dad. My husband and my best friend also encouraged me to go on a short trip with him.
I was initially very unsure. As far as I could remember, my dad and I had never been away on a trip together. I was filled with struggles, worries, and conflict. Not only was our relationship distant and unfamiliar, there was also a lot of hurt from the past. In the midst of these struggles, God used a Korean drama to speak to me, changing the way I saw the hurt and pain my dad had caused in the past. I remember God telling me that my dad has never been set free from the prison that he had put himself in. He needed God’s love and my forgiveness. My dad needed the Light of the Lord to deliver him from darkness.
Through a very tearful prayer, I laid down my stubbornness and all the hurt that my dad has caused in my life. I asked Father God to restore my relationship with my earthly father and to lead my life.
Right before our trip, God sent a sister to pray for me. God spoke to me while we prayed, saying that He wants my dad to receive complete deliverance, and to be freed from all bondage and guilt. He also wants to heal and to re-establish our relationship in His love.
After that prayer, I was overcome with peace and totally set free.
As we arrived, by car, to our destination, my dad turned towards me, tears coming down his face, telling me that he was full of remorse for what he had done to my mom. He told me that he keeps dreaming about what happened that fateful night, about how he had hurt her.
My dad asked me to call my mom, who lives in Taipei. When she picked up, he woefully begged her to forgive him. And forgive him she did. She told him that it was time to let go of the past and to look to the future. It was time to be freed. My dad and I held each other and cried as I told him that I, too, forgive him and asked him to forgive himself.
What was once a shattered family became whole again because of our Father’s love. My dad also became a follower of Christ through this experience. I am so grateful to our Lord God because only He can do what is impossible with man!
In life, whether we have inflicted or experienced pain, we all have a past that is filled with hurt and sorrow. But if we continue to wallow in the pain of our past, we will never be able to move forward. The Bible tells us to “forget what lies in the past and to look forward to what lies ahead.” When we entrust God, through faith, with our past and our pain, I believe that God will turn our tears into blessings.
May all glory and praise be to our Loving Father.
jnX US team member
June 10, 2019